Hot Topic: How Do The Sexes Talk About Sex?
I’ve gotten quite clever about talking about what I do for a living, especially in mixed company. First I say that I teach intimacy workshops. That typically leads to more questions. I choose the words I use to clarify based on my perception of my audience. Sometimes I’m very tactful, and sometimes I’m quite direct.
Not too long ago, I was on a Caribbean cruise with family. When the topic came up and clarification was needed, I said “I teach workshops for women providing practical instruction on intimate topics.” A young married man at the dinner table replied “Oh, you teach them to lick the tip.” All the men at the table laughed. The women at the table gave the side-eye.
The experience left me pondering. There are obviously differences in how men and women talk about sex. When I took my partner to see Girls Trip, which includes a lot of talk between women about sex, I found it much more humorous than my sweetie did.
This is not a surprise. According to The Female Brain by Louann Brizendine, “in the brain centers for language and hearing…women have 11 percent more neurons than men…men, by contrast, have two and a half times the brain space devoted to sexual drive.” Additionally, in the area of sex, men and women are socialized differently in our society. It really is no wonder that we communicate differently about sex.
Let’s find out how differently. Do you ever talk about sex in mixed company? How is it different from when you’re strictly with your own gender? Do you use different terminology for the male and female anatomy? How comfortable are you when the opposite sex talks about sex in front of you?
Have some fun and join the discussion below!
Welcome to Intimate Explorations!
I'm Tanya Finks - Dating and Relationship Coach | Gallup-certified Strengths Coach | Sex Educator | Passionate advocate for dating intentionally, building collaborative romantic partnerships, and fostering fulfilling physical intimacy. I also love my partner (madly!), international travel, and anything superhero.