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On Opposite Sides: What to Do When it Feels Like You’re Sleeping With the Enemy – Part Four

For all the reasons we’ve already discussed – how distasteful we may find it, how alienating it can feel, what we think it says about us, and how it may threaten our concept of ourselves – it can be challenging when our one-and-only has views that differ from ours on issues of personal import. In this, the fourth and final installment, I advocate prioritizing action over belief, then making agreements where necessary.

On Opposite Sides: What to Do When It Feels Like You’re Sleeping With the Enemy – Part Three

This week we’re continuing our exploration of what to do when you and your partner find yourselves on opposite sides of the types of issues that can be extremely divisive. We’re not talking about the “you didn’t take out the trash again” scenarios. Or the “can I just get settled before you talk my ear off?” situations.

On Opposite Sides – What to Do When It Feels Like You’re Sleeping with the Enemy – Part 2

In part one of this series, we established that even in harmonious relationships, you might find that you and your partner are on opposite sides of the types of issues that divide countries (apparently). You might have come together on passion over commonality. Or you may have evolved differently over time. However you got here, here you are. So how do you navigate the issues without letting them erode the bond between you? Part one covers the importance of disagreeing respectfully. Let’s continue with part two of our exploration.

On Opposite Sides: What to Do When It Feels Like You’re Sleeping With the Enemy

What happens when the person with whom you intensely disagree sleeps in your bed every night? The passion can be intensified when it’s your partner who holds opposite views from your own. I’m talking about the types of issues that divide countries. How do you engage in discussion about those issues without letting it divide your household? Read on to discover five tips for what to do when it feels like you’re sleeping with the enemy.

Live Wire: Week of September 18, 2017

In this week’s look around the web at all things dating, relationships, and intimacy, we discover when to let your freak fly; six signs you’re not putting enough effort into your relationship; 21 relationship facts; how to connect, even if you’re angry; and what your first date outfit says.

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Staying Connected: Eight Epic Tips for Connecting Physically, Even If You’re Angry

Learning how to connect when you’re troubled, hurt or angry can help defuse negative feelings and lead to greater openness in your relationship. In fact, resolving differences productively without creating distance or impacting your physical relationship can increase feelings of closeness and intimacy and make you that much stronger together.

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Live Wire: Week of September 11, 2017

In this week’s look around the web at all things dating, relationships, and intimacy, we discover what to let go of for a happier life; the secret life of newlyweds; relational wellness; ten kinds of men you will date after 40; and how to get back in the dating game as a single parent.

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Love Line: Do You Work With an Ex?

On NBC’s now cancelled The Mysteries of Laura, Debra Messing’s character, Laura Diamond, works with her ex-husband, Jake, played by Josh Lucas. Jake wants Laura back and is actively pursuing her, but Laura is in a relationship with Tony, albeit new. This situation is clearly contrived for drama and intrigue, however, it’s a real possibility in real life. Unfortunately, in real life, we don’t have script-writers to help us behave in perfectly mature ways under such potentially messy circumstances.

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Live Wire: Week of September 4, 2017

In this week’s look around the web at all things dating, relationships, and intimacy, we learn about when men fail to perform; five effective ways to get more out of your marriage; sexual exploration in early childhood; the marriage check-in and how it can transform your marriage; and 14 things women wished men knew about sex.

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Live Wire: Week of August 28, 2017

In this week’s look around the web at all things dating, relationships, and intimacy, we discover modern sexual etiquette – the ten commandments; 30 subtle ways that women are flirting with men; five dos and don’ts for a first date; how to enhance the sexual experience through the five senses; and why you might be dreaming about your ex.

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Live Wire: Week of August 21, 2017

In this week’s look around the web at all things dating, relationships, and intimacy, we discover 16 sure-fire ways to stop fighting about money in your marriage; the resilience formula and how it applies to resolving any problem situation; how to strengthen marriage after kids; 6 tips to make your relationship last beyond the honeymoon period; and one woman’s worst online dating experiences.

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Survey: How People Meet

In Hello, Stranger, I encouraged apprehensive daters to get outside their comfort zones by engaging with others while they’re moving about in the world. While I stand behind the advice, it begs the question, how do people meet? Are some ways of meeting people more effective than others? Today’s survey asks the question, how did you meet your partner?

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Live Wire: Week of August 14, 2017

In this week’s look around the web at all things dating, relationships, and intimacy, we discover everything you need to know about having the sex talk with your partner; the surprising reason you become deeply upset with your partner; emotional conversations that create couple’s intimacy; how to deal with your partner’s opposite schedule; and how to survive midlife dating.

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Hi there!  I’m Tanya Finks.  I help people date intentionally, build collaborative romantic partnerships, and foster fulfilling physical intimacy.  I’m happily coupled, I’m a staunch believer in vacation, and I love anything crime drama, all things Shonda Rhimes, and everything superhero.


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